please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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