I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
