I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
