Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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