somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
