butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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