Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
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It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
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I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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