So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Randomize
