Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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