Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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