omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
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