This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Are we still banned from the library?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
