shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
