My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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