i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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