: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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