don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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