I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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