Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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