there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
