I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
