Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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