im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize