Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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