I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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