spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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