I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Randomize
