Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it penis luge time yet?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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