News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
