Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
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