that's an acceptable place to lick
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
