i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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