Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
