he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
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All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
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I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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