kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize