I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
