I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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