i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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