Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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