Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
