I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?