the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
