I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
as a side note pls kill me
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
We smell like vodka and hangover
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