Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
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