In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
