Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
