i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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