It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
