Sry I called you an 8
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
