life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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