Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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